Saturday, January 29, 2011

Who needs structure?

I've been having a hard time thinking up things to write. This is an awful predicament for someone who actually writes about nonsense, as you can imagine. How the heck could I run out of stuff to write about when I'm free to write about anything under the sun?

Maybe I need some *gasp!* "structure".

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I was having a conversation with a friend of mine, about maybe setting some parameters for this here blog, you know, like a general topic or something. At the time, it seemed preposterous, it was the freedom to blab about anything and everything that gave me the idea to set up this blog in the first place, and I'm supposed to define boundaries?

But then, something (or nothing, rather) happened and I'm all out of things to write about. What the...?

It all starts with choosing what to write about, a thought comes into my head, and I start on it, then my ADD kicks in and another thought takes its place, thereby displacing any progress that was made on prior topic. I start writing about this new thing and before long I'm off blabbering about something entirely different. It's a tough process, and alcohol-aided writing doesn't seem to help me focus, either.

I've heard of this phenomenon before, or maybe it was just a quote I heard, going something like "...he who has the freedom to do anything ends up doing nothing..." or some other crap. Is this what they call a paradox or is it an oxymoron? I really can't bother myself to analyze the difference. Maybe I should have paid more attention to my language classes.

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Speaking of language classes, I think I remember the reason why I wasn't paying as much attention as I should have: my freshman high school english teacher was hot. This, on the part of the whole high school academe is (was?) a mistake. Year on year, hordes of high school graduates with a weak grasp of the English language manage to squeak past the bare minimum requirements and diminish the collective grammatical intellect of the population in general. Then again, better flunk English (which is only a second language in this country) than Math. Heck, my Math teachers were fugly and yet I failed in that anyway. How low could my grades have sunk further if my Math teacher was hot?

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Wait, what was the original topic? Oh yeah, structure. Sorry about that, damn attention span.

So this structure thing, it now seems to be a viable solution. At least if I lay down some general topic, then maybe I could have more focus and actually write something that makes some sense. I've actually went as far as listing down some topics for my future consideration. I've written them down as possible blog titles:

1. Personal Destitution 101

Where I basically write about how I manage to spend way beyond my means and yet still survive (barely). This is so not Self-help.

2. Living with laundry

Basically, this will touch on the intricacies that I have learned (and am still learning) from doing my own laundry. From reviews of different detergents to the effects of hot and cold rinsing on polyesters.

If ever I do roll out this particular blog, feel free to hunt me down whack me in the head with a 9-iron. Please?

3. The most awful and boring places on Earth

Every travel blog I've read have the words 'amazing' or 'tranquil' or 'exciting' in them. Mine's gonna have phrases such as 'rat-infested' and 'what a waste of time' and 'ugliest hookers, ever' instead.

4. Before the "thud"

Now this is part journalism and part fiction. Since I see an awful lot of roadkill in a week, the plan is to spot roadkill, stop and take a picture of it (without being roadkill, myself), try to go all CSI and shit on it and make out what their last thoughts could have been and post pictures and thoughts online.

I figure this could potentially earn me a Pulitzer. We'll see.

5. 365 days (and nights) of baby-wipes and lotion

Uhm... I guess this is pretty self-explanatory?

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But of course, even if I do decide to take on another blog, I would never abandon this one! I've put too much time and effort into this, besides, I'm pretty lazy that I'd doubt I'd have the energy to figure out how to make another. Also, I've tried to make one in the past but was forced to put it down before I made the move public.

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Wow, structure notwithstanding, who would've guessed I'd be able to add another post that's, well, barely worth publishing?

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